The Slippery Slope of Pen Pals
Posted under: 
PenPal
Recently, I picked up a new pen pal.
Awesome, right? We send honest-to-goodness actual handwritten letters to each other.
It’s fun to do, and fun to get.
Except…
…except the person I’m penpalling with has incredibly fun handwriting, and I am the queen of bizarre handwriting changes mid-letter.
She’s assured me that she doesn’t care (and she’s well aware of the scope of the problem, since my last letter had at least five different handwriting styles in it) but seeing her neat penmanship has ignited within me the burning desire to have handwriting that doesn’t suck.
Old School
In today’s world of instantaneous communication via phone, chat, texting, and emailing, just engaging in the act of writing letters is strange enough to be noteworthy. Nearly everyone I’ve mentioned it to gets the same look on their face – brows drawn, forehead furrowed, lips purse, and nose slightly wrinkled. “Letters?” they ask, as though trying to capture the last fleeting fragments of a dream, “Like…in the mail? With a stamp?”
As if archaically sending mail wasn’t bizarre enough, actually writing out the text of the letter by hand is fast becoming absurdity. Fun, playful fonts abound. If I want to send a letter, why not type it up, print it out, and send it that way? Guaranteed to be legible! (This, by the way, is how Bre and I send our Whiskers and Lace letters, to BOTH of our relief! *laughs*)
Handwriting is quickly becoming a lost art, and with valid reason. Computers are everywhere, and handwriting is hard. It’s like being taught to do post-algebra math without a calculator – an exercise to deepen understanding, not a real-world application.
However, there’s also something that strikes a chord, deep in my soul about sitting down and penning out a letter to a friend.
It hits a sour note when I realize just how awful my handwriting is, though.
Learning to Write
With my penpal’s help (she’s more than happy to enable someone to one of her beloved hobbies!) I’m realearning how to write.
And yes, this involves those Big Chief tablets from my childhood.
Some of these rules pertain more to those who want to learn how to write with the old style ink pens, or move into calligraphy.
Getting Started
The first step is to figure out how you currently write. If you’d like to do the exercise, grab a pen and some paper, and write something. For argument’s sake, we’ll tell you to write the word, “Egads!”
Rule 1 – Holding the Pen
Quick! Look at your hand. How are you holding the pen? There are so many ways to hold a pen these days – and NONE OF THEM ARE WRONG. Why? Because the modern ball-point pen is a very forgiving creature. Most pens aren’t going to care how you hold the pen.
If you find that your hand/fingers hurt after you write for just a few moments, you may want to look into learning another way to hold the pen, but aside from that, you’re probably golden.
If, however, you want to learn to write using those fancy shmancy calligraphy pens, you would want to learn to hold your pen thusly : pen held between thumb and forefinger only. Other fingers curled out of the way and relaxed underneath. The top of the pen rests just above or on the knuckle bump for your pointer finger.
My default hand position is similar, but the top of the pen rests in that webbing sandbar in the center of the C made from thumb to forefinger, and I use my middle finger as well as my pointer finger on the pen. I keep reminding myself to change my hand position, because I DO want to use those fancy pens.
Want pictures? You shall have them! Behold! > http://www.paperpenalia.com/handwriting.html
If you like, try writing our test word, “Egads!” a few times in different hand positions.
Rule 2 – Paint, Don’t Draw
I’d like you to write “Egads!” one more time now in any hand position, but pay attention to your wrist and fingers and the way they move when you write the word.
If you’re like me (and most people in the under-forty crowd) you probably use your wrist and fingers to draw the shape of each letter.
Experts (based on a hasty web search) say that true handwriting is painted on the page, not drawn. That means you don’t move your fingers/wrist to create the letters, you move your arm/shoulder.
The easiest way to see the difference is to air write. If you’re somewhere nobody can see you (or you don’t care if they do) lift your pen from the paper (you can keep it in your hand) and, as you normally would, write “Egads!” in the air.
Now, write it again, this time using your arm to move your hand to create the letters, instead of your fingers. WRITE BIG! Nobody’s testing you on how tiny or complete your air writing is, and it’s easier to feel the motion if it’s exaggerated.
Big difference, eh?
This is a freedom thing – all those fun swirly characters you see in calligraphy? Those are hard to impossible if you’re drawing (and thus confined to the area your fingers can reach with the pen) instead of painting your letters.
And guess what, your painting handwriting probably sucks more than your drawing handwriting right now. It’s okay. Mine does, too.
Rule 3 – Don’t Plonk
If you were to write a longer bit of text – say a sentence or two, you would probably find yourself picking your hand up and plonking it down to reposition for the next word.
Those are bad things, from a handwriting perspective.
If your hand/wrist is staying in the same spot on the paper while you write, your handwriting will be cramped and weird(er) as you try and fit in as many words as you can before you move your hand.
If you are constantly gliding your hand along the page as you write, you are giving each letter equal freedom, space, and comfort to be written.
Rule 4 – Don’t Hurry
Probably not a surprise to anyone, but if you actually slow down and think about each letter as you write it, you’ll see a marked improvement.
My worst handwriting comes when I write the way I type – one sentence at a time. Even slowing my brain/hand down to one WORD at a time gives me a marked improvement.
You’re writing something by hand. Why not slow down to enjoy the process?
I mean, my meeting notes at work are still going to be barely legible since I’m trying to write as fast as people talk, but even my grocery lists could benefit from a little handwriting TLC. Actually, those could benefit from a LOT of TLC.
Exercises
Air Writing
Practice writing in the air, first. You’re reprogramming your hand/brain coordination when it comes to writing, and there’s no shame in baby steps. I practice where people can’t SEE me, but that’s not shame, that’s just not wanting to answer questions about why I’m conducting an invisible and inaudible orchestra.
Start big, with huge, loopy letters. Once you’re comfortable with using your arm to write in smaller spaces, you can move on to…
Paper Writing
Paper! This is where those Big Chief tablets come in handy, if you can find ‘em. If not, you can use a regular paper binder, and allow yourself a good three or four lines per line of handwriting practice to start.
As you progress, you’ll gain more control over the letters and you’ll find your big handwriting shrinks down to much less alarming sizes very quickly.
Lines and Circles
It’s tempting to start practicing with actual letters, but resist! Start with something much simpler – lines and circles. In one row across your paper, draw (properly!) a series of lines slanted to the right. Concentrate on control, and making the lines parallel and uniform.
Now do a series of lines slanted to the left. If you’re like me, these are gonna look BAD.
Now do a series of circles. Again, if you’re like me? These made those left lines look good.
Now do a spiral (I think of it as a continuous cursive letter ‘e’). This one’s fun, but my loops are nowhere near uniform yet.
Date
Every day, make sure you write the date by your practice lines, so you can watch your improvement over time. My first practice lines took up three wide-ruled notebook paper lines. I’m down to one line, but I need a lot more practice on those loops. They’re still too uncontrolled.
Even so, I can go back to my first attempts last week and see improvement on all of them. I’ve even started sneaking in a few letters here and there, hinting at later practice using the new method to write familiar letters.
Goals
Remember to keep your goals in sight. Someday, I look forward to having incredible handwriting, but my medium-term goal is to be able to write letters to people that are not only legible, they display the appreciation and respect I have for the recipient of the letter.
Aaaand I’m a min/maxer in real life, not just in my gaming. If I’m going to be a healer, I’m going to be a GREAT healer. If I’m going to be a letter writer, I’m going to be a GREAT letter writer.
Tail
And that was about eleven times longer than I expected it to be. None of you are surprised, I’m sure.
I AM curious – how many of you are satisfied with your handwriting? My expectations are that most people wouldn’t mind improving their handwriting, but probably wouldn’t have much day-to-day use for the kind of calligraphic writing I’m talking about in this post, but I’d love to be surprised.
Anyone else out there writing letters? Have a penpal?
Guilty as charged – though I suffer from the same problem as everyone else. I’m OK with my handwriting, but I don’t find it anything to be overly proud of.
http://i226.photobucket.com/albums/dd289/caliken_2007/Historybook2.jpg (from Caliken) and http://66.147.242.192/~operinan/4/4101/4101_2117_Taylor.jpg from Susie Taylor are my personal models >.>
Another excellent resource though, is the Penmanship forum at the Fountain Pen Network. Everyone from the most mundane to the professional calligraphers, and lots of different handwritings. Because, regardless, the most important thing about handwriting is that it’s legible. After that, it’s just aesthetics!
http://www.fountainpennetwork.com/forum/index.php?showforum=12
My handwriting has always been bad; today, it’s horrible. I rarely write anything, except to sign credit card receipts. Well, I’ll occasionally make notes while playing WoW, but those don’t last too long.
Unfortunately, my handwriting is not enhanced by some mild arthritis in my fingers. My wife, on the other hand, (see what I did there?) has very good handwriting, and she does write letters to a lifelong friend regularly. Invariably on a car trip, she’ll pull out paper and pen to start a letter to Marylin.
However, you have spurred in me a desire to at least make the effort to write more legibly–so at least I can read my own scribbles, and maybe hold on to them a little longer.
.-= Steve´s last blog ..Recommended Reading: November 2 – 8 =-.
@Anna
Piffle. Your handwriting is fun, legible, and reveals a bit about your personality, I think. =]
@Steve
I wonder if writing using the calligraphic methods here (rather than using your fingers to draw the letters) might actually be easier for you, given the arthritis.
Also, holy wow on your wife writing in the car. I can’t even focus on a digital camera in the car without getting carsick.
@Steve – I can’t imagine writing in the car. Yikes. For reference, this is a snapshot of my handwriting from the letter that’s in the mail today for Tami. The image quality is terrible thanks to my using a cell phone for it, but it’s a halfway decent sample. Don’t mind the scratch out!
I’m… curious as to what it says about my personality >.>
Should I be scared?
@Anna
*squeal* Oooh, another letter? So soon?! *bounce, bounce*
(Yes, fun mail temporarily turns me into a five-year-old)
And your handwriting says that you pay attention to detail but don’t sweat the small stuff or strive for perfection. You like to have fun (how fun is that ‘d’? Seriously fun) but you also don’t lose sight of the bigger picture (the entire letter is legible and consistent, giving the recipient (me!) the impression that she’s got your full attention to what you’re doing as you write.
=]
And also that you like peanut butter sandwiches. I get that from the…uh…’m’
;)
Tami I can only imagine your writing, where the simplest tail end of a word produces a detailed picture of something like a “manatee with a balloon” ;-)
@Byrd
*giggles* Her second letter maaaaaaaaay have included a happy manatee sketch.
Pen Pals! What fun! I must admit, I’m jealous of those of you with pen pals – I had one when I was little through a pen pal program at my school. But, as kids are, I quickly lost interest and stopped.
My handwriting is atrocious and the developing carpal tunnel in my right hand doesn’t help it all. However, I do try (when I think about it) write as neatly as I can even if it is just a grocery list.
.-= Tristina´s last blog ..Resolutions =-.
@Tristina
It’s incredibly difficult to find a penpal, because BEING a penpal is hard.
Most of the people I talk to find it difficult to think of what they would put in a letter. I think it’s similar to the mentality about blogging. People who are comfortable blogging regularly probably don’t have as many hangups over what to put in a letter. ^_^
Yikes for carpal tunnel.
You know, that brings up a question – I’ve read a lot of folks with hand problems (arthritis, carpal tunnel, and the like) who’ve tried out the DVORAK keyboard layout and shown vast improvement. Have you ever looked into that?
I’ve considered learning it to stave off those things – I dont’ see myself typing any LESS as time goes by, that’s for sure! – but I’ve not had the gumption to get started.
I had a pen pal in the Philippines from when I was 8 years old to about the time I was 18 and started college. We wrote letter to each other for 10 years! How crazy is that? We actually lost touch when all the technology came into being popular, both because of our busy lives and differing interests. I really should look to see if she’s on Facebook because she was on MySpace a while back, but I’ve since decided MySpace can DIAF.
You know what bugs me? Seeing a (1) after your blog’s name in Google Reader, then realizing when I click that I’ve already read this column from the Twitter link Anna put up!
*grumble* Thought I was getting a twofer today!
.-= Steve´s last blog ..What I’m Tweeting: Win7 and Other Topics =-.
Did I really smudge peanut butter on your letter?! I’m… slightly mortified.
(and it wasn’t a sandwich, I was eating peanut butter with an apple and some cheese >.> <3 peanut butter)
That’s so cool–I so admire people who take the time to write letters!
My handwriting has always been sloppy, which is why I love the computer!
.-= Crabby McSlacker´s last blog ..Smart Phones and Dumb Humans: Is Web Technology Messing With Your Brain? =-.
Thank you for your mention on Cranky Fitness !
I have terrible handwriting, but then I’m supposed to :-)
Do you know I’m also an artist? I can’t draw worth a darn either, but with painting, I can redo it over and over until it looks OK. If I had my way, pencils would have the opposite proportion of lead to eraser!
.-= Dr. J´s last blog ..Healthy nuts, matcha green tea and lentils =-.
When I was younger I used to have a Japanese penpal, and we would try and out do each other with stickers on letters, and fancy note paper, it was also good that we could practise our language skills ( my Nihongo, and her English. We would also send each other little packages of sweets or little presents – can’t do that with email -
.-= Zahrah´s last blog ..Where to Farm Eternal Fires / Crystallized Fire =-.
@Adlib
Wow, that’s a pretty long relationship! I’d say it’s definitely worth at least looking them up, seeing if you’ve still got some things in common. =]
@Steve
*laughs* She was RT’ing what I’d tweeted.
And I’ve got like three drafts waiting to get written. But Choose still needs editing and polishing! It’ll hafta wait! ^_^
@Anna
*laughs* Oh, goodness no! Or at least, if you DID smudge with peanutbutter, I didn’t notice it. That was me being random. Or possibly psychic. Or psychicly random. I can’t tell what the lotto numbers are or when there’ll be a terrible accident, but I’m crackerjack with sandwiches.
@Crabby
I also type at about ten times the speed I can write by hand. I ADORE my computer. <3
@Dr J
I did not know you’re an artist! I’ll have to go through your blog link and find stuff. It’s funny, I love to ink, but I don’t so much like the coloring part. =]
@Zahrah
Agreed on the little packages and whatnot. There’s just…something flat out special about mail. <3
i have a sample of your handwritting from college. i should pull it out.
As an engineer, my handwriting is very plain, efficient and legible. Thanks ENGR 111 and Single Stroke Gothic!
@kristenSue
Yikes. I’d burn that handwriting sample. I can only imagine how bad it is.
I always liked that engineering handwriting training. =]
I’m sure that this sounds a little funny, but I had an end-of-block exam today with short answer questions, and I tried the whole write-with-my-arm-and-shoulder-and-not-just-my-fingers-and-wrist for a few words. Not a huge difference, but there was a little something different in my letters. I will have to try this again later!
Just FYI. All of the art that accompanies my columns has been done by me. Thank you for any time you waste looking at my stuff :-)
.-= Dr. J´s last blog ..Fat-loving moms may have taller children =-.
I decided to hold my breath while reading this post and died 4 times before I finished it!
@Rhotley
*raspberry*
The only handwritten letters I write are to my great Aunt and Uncle’s, because I know they still enjoy getting snail mail.
But my 17 year old daughter still sends handwritten thank you notes, which she is more than happy to do!
Sadly, my friends step-son, who is a freshman in college, needed to send some stuff back home from school. He had no idea how even mail an envelope!!
.-= Biz´s last blog ..Sunshine Day and BSI Ricotta Cheese! =-.
@Biz
No idea how to mail an envelope?! *laughs* Wow, that’s…wow.
Hooray for another handwritten letter/note proponent!
.-= Tami´s last blog ..What E-Readers SHOULD Be =-.